Doctor Wow!

The world's longest-running science fiction TV show is back! It's clocked only half the total screen time of Star Trek but it's been on the air longer (five more years and counting) and has the distinction of being a single serial - no next generation spin-offs with tangential premises. Though I have heard its original run called "T.O.S." already, as in "That Old Shit".

New Doctor Who is refreshed and re-tooled with a budget to hold a torch to the best U.S. genre shows. It's a huge hit back home. Fanboys everywhere are rejoicing that something they love has broken back into the mainstream. Critics praise it for revitalizing family drama and "appointment TV" - it's no small feat to get mum, dad, sis and bro together at 7pm each Saturday in this digital, "on demand" age.

We're three paragraphs in... you're probably wondering if I'm going to tell you what the show is all about.



The last of the Time Lords wanders space and time, setting crooked matters straight along his way. He's the antithesis of Captain Picard and his Prime Directive. Though his people have a similar rule about non-interference, he eschewed it as irresponsible. If someone can help then they should, he believes. He never reveals his name, calling himself simply The Doctor - or, in extreme circumstances, Dr. John Smith. He picks up new travelling companions from time to time - usually chicks - and has the gift of cheating death a dozen times, regenerating his body to live anew. In this way, cast members come and go frequently but the momentum of the show isn't halted.

It was devised in the 1960s to teach children about science and history, but it's probably the most imaginitive TV show I've ever seen. It may look like sci-fi on the packet but, depending where our hero materializes each week, individual stories range from faithful historicals to gothic horrors and black comedies. His timeship is supposed to always blend in to its surroundings, but it's an old model and this feature hasn't worked since the first episode, set in then-present day London. A tight budget required an inventive work-around and made the British police box a national icon that's lasted long after they were phased out of use in the real world. (In fact, the B.B.C. owns the design copyright now, having purchased it from the Metropolitan Police.) It's a thrill to see that blue box in anachronistic settings - like seeing a Harley Davidson on the moon.

Twelve years in, the show is at the height of its popularity. Tom Baker is adored at home and abroad for his bohemian take on the character, and plays The Doctor for seven years.



Flash forward another twelve years and the show is on its last legs. It was sad, like watching a morphine-happy relative slowly give up living. The Powers That Be dripped out a final few seasons and finally euthanized the old coot in 1989. In 1996, Fox and the B.B.C. co-produced a poorly-written TV movie starring Paul (Withnail & I) McGann and Eric (Julia's brother) Roberts but, unfortunately, it stank on ice.

Like Fox, the B.B.C. has made some questionable decisions - like destroying over 100 early episodes because they thought they had no further use for them, or kow-towing to the moral majority and sanitizing the show beyond belief in the 80s. But Paramount could take a leaf from their book when it comes to taking time out to revitalize a beleaguered franchise. Take the genre-busting producer of Queer As Folk, an established stage and film actor for the least derivative take on the character since Baker in the 70s, and one good-looking ex-teen pop sensation who can actually act. Tell stories with confidence, but don't take it all too seriously. Then pray!

This year we met Rose, a sales assistant in a London department store. She's a bit chavvy but the Doctor saves her from an attack by "living plastic" and blows up the department store where she works - "it's a price war", he jokes. (By the way, he's 900 and she's 19. Woody Allen is envious.) He expands her mind and she brings out his compassionate side. It's a love story way beyond the physical and the trip of a lifetime.

Rose: "If you're an alien, why do you sound like you're from the North?"
The Doctor (defensively): "Lots of planets have a north."

From there, it gets funner. In episode 2, an "ancient Earth ballad" (Britney Spears' Toxic) is played over CGI shots of a space station exterior and our planet burning to death. Then Stanley Kubrick turns in his grave.

I won't enthuse any more because you should watch it, not have it spoiled by me. (One more reason to move to Canada!) It's hard to convey to non-Brits the place this show holds in our hearts... Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood? Apart from a couple of ill-advised burp and fart jokes, it doesn't pander to children nor shirk from addressing subjects such as death and sexuality. Kids are being challenged by their entertainment once more and have a moral alien hero to follow, just like my generation did.

Doctor Who is no longer an artistic black hole, and talent is lining up to appear in the second new series. A third series has been commissioned already. It's completely fucking wonderful to have it back.